Wedding Daze II

I have not posted my new year blogs and believe me, I have lot of things to talk about for my new year postings. But my heart been calling me to write about this first. I have been mentioning and publishing about my excitement of my sister wedding to the whole world. Well at least to the messenger, friendster, facebook and blogging community which I think nearly whole world populations. :)

We are indeed very excited. My little sister...my cute small little sister that
I used to pick a fight with, that I can't be near with (well for at least 17 years of my life). Thanks to the grown up brain and the difficult life we had, my sister now is the closest sister, friend and companion I ever had. We shared everything (yes, everything) together. I must admit that sometimes her "blizzard" mood sometimes makes me wanted to kill her...

I'll be lying if I said I was OK with the thought of letting her go to life her own life. I'll be lying if I said I am OK now. I am actually not but I'm trying to accept things the way they suppose to be. I know I'll lost somebody, there will be nobody to accompany me at home, to pick a fight with, to tease with. I know I will somehow miss her voices and shout whenever she is bored or whenever she is trying to make a god damn awful singing voice and most importantly cruising together with her or even spend our holiday together. I will also be lying if I said I did not shed a single tears while I'm writing this.

But, of all the things, of all the pain of letting go... I believe I am letting her go to someone worth, I know he could take care of her the best and I know he is the right one for her. And I believe she find happiness with him but I want her to know that I will always be there. I will always be her wings that will protect her from any harm and I will always be her best sister for now and always will be...

In my previous post, I have mentioned about the hard headed mom we had. Well, as what we have expected after all the persuasion...she still with her decision, she will not give a damn about this wedding. I sometimes wonder, what kind of mom Ihad? I know I'm not suppose to have this thought. I'm soory. Well I actually love my mom even how bad things are but to do this? I know she is after one thing, for sure but I will not reveal what it is.

For god sake, I really hope she change for the best or she could end up being a misery old lady where nobody will appreciate like someone I know. Guess, it runs in her blood. I am so pissed right now, though I know I'm not suppose to. But, I need someone to put some sense in her brain for once!

Oh, god...please forgive me...